6 years ago, I made a commitment to myself.
There I was, looking at my self in the mirror in the tiny room of the cruise boat I was working on at the time, and I told myself, “From this moment on, anytime you are faced with a situation that makes you feel uncomfortable, you are going to face it!”
Basically I decided to get comfortable being uncomfortable, and grow some fucken’ balls.
Read the above again.
After that my life became CRAZY… in GOOD WAY!
I started reading books on being confident, and they all said the same thing: “You must put yourself in high stress situations regularly to build a tolerance to that feeling you call anxiety”.
So I began making a list of shit that scared me:
-Go to a jam session where everyone is better than me
-approaching a beautiful woman surrounded by guys in a bar
-walk around a mall with my finger up my nose for 35min (yeah… I actually did that!)
-Dance in a restaurant to live music when no one else is dancing
-Dress in woman’s clothes and walk down the street in broad day light during a busy part of the day and HIT ON GUYS.
-Do 5 minutes of stand up comedy
OK, you get the idea. I’m kind of extreme by nature… but I’ll tell you what. Doing the above made me pretty fucken’ fearless.
You don’t have to go crazy like I did, but once you allow yourself to sit and swim in being uncomfortable… you’ll begin to change the way you experience anxiety. As the Virginia based Cognitive Therapist Larry Cohen says, “Looking at anxiety as our response to perceived danger, the purpose of the anxiety response become obvious: self-protection.”
What happens is that we grow up in such a safe bubble, that anything outside of it is perceived as “dangerous”, so our mind protects us. Well dude, if you’ve ever heard of the idea of “being adventurous”, pop the fucken bubble, and grow some motherfucken balls! (create a list of shit that scares you and do it). Because honestly man, the people who have the most balls (and you know who they are), have the most fun, and yeah, insult some people along the way, but you can’t make everyone happy except yourself.